Tuesday, February 19, 2008

Been MIA but I am alive

Where have I been ?!
Well for one my internet connection has been extremely sketchy for the last 4 days and so I have hardly been on.
It has actually been a good break, a well needed one.
We had issues to deal with.
House, plumbing, money, love life, parenting.....
It has been a heavy few days to say the least. It seems that every once in a while things just come to a head and one minnute everything is fine and the next nothing is fine.

I chalk a lot of it up to the weather, I HATE winter! The fact that this year has been a cold one has made it worse but I am usually just a little down during the winter to start with.
However this year is tough.....we are trying to rearange, de-clutter and clean up, the process is brutal and involves piles and stacks of mess all over the place waiting for proper storage. I hate this, I cannot function and sit and stare at it thinking I must deal with it so I can do something fun.
Plumbing went Friday night. Dave plunged a face cloth out the tub, but it still won't drain properly and the toilet wont drain. Of course we refuse to pay weekend rates and this being a long weekend we have gone three days with trecks to the basement potty.

In my mind is .....I really want to go to BlogHer and I have to save money.....how can I do this with added expenses.
Oh, ya, the furnace fan went on a weekend too, couldn't wait for that though and paid double! Ouch!
Then Dave's truck went into the shop Saturday morning......$2000.00 later it came out.
Double ouch!
Needless to say BlogHer is getting further and further out of my reach. So sad!

Then Dave and I went on a date, to talk.
Seems since haveing kids our relationship has suffered, we just don't go out of the way to do special thing for each other or ....I don't sexify my look, I am a frumpy mommy and well, I need to put more effort into me and him.
There is more, so much more, why does everything crumble in on me at once?!
So the last few nights I have been thinking, journaling and trying to make personal changes.
It is hard!

Anyway....blah, blah...sorry to vent, it just helps to type it out somehow.
We still had fun, even though my head was full of trying ot figure things out we headed out to the cottage to take advantage of the third nice day this winter.

It was amazing out, the perfect winter day! Tons of snow and happy skidooing boys....if all winter days where like this, I would love winter!

Anyway I hope to get this house and my head in order in the next few days, I am dying to get back at my paints and finnish a few half completed projects.
Thanks for bearing with me, I feel like a rollercoaster ride!
Click here for the rest of the photo's from the last few days.


Hannah said...

I've missed you! But it sounds like you needed a computer break ;-)

Sorry to hear about the car bills, that's not cool! I hope you'll win the lottery or somehow find the money to go to BlogHer. That would be awesome "Anna time" for you!

And I have to say, go easy on yourself when it comes to the love life thing! With the sleep issues you have been dealing with, I'm not surprised that loving and sexiness and all that has been put on the back burner! But seriously, it's all part of having kids. Date nights are great if you have them regularly. Otherwise it's hard to snatch couple time. Oh, and you certainly don't look like a frumpy mommy to me ... you look like a NORMAL mommy! ;-)

Kami said...

Anna, we had the same kind of weekend. Things kinda blew up over here too. I think it's good to get it out sometimes but man I am emotionally drained.


Take care!

Melanie said...

Hey there! I totally understand everything that you wrote about in this last blog. I have been going through a lot of the same things. Duncan won't sleep. Both Skyla and Duncan are sick. Skyla bonked her head bad this morning. I feel frumpy too. My marriage has really suffered since having kids as well. Dates really help. We try to do one once a week even if its just at home at the kitchen table drinking lattes. I understand about car bills too. Our van we just bought in the summer (used however) needs about $4000 in repairs! Yikes! And I understand about everything coming crashing in at once. Hang in there and keep praying. My husband has to remind me this all the time.

Family Adventure said...

Anna, we all have weekends like this one. I think winter is a big part of the problem, but having young children is a major stress on love life AND finances. It doesn't help when cars and houses break down at the same time.

Hang in there, my friend.


Angela Fehr said...

You're brave to be so honest, Anna. I've often said (having three kids in 3 1/2 years) that small children are not really good for a marriage! The best advice I ever received is to just "get through it" and sometimes that's all we can do.

Though I hate the term "yummy mummy" I have noticed that I feel a lot better about myself when I am putting some effort into my appearance and have some great clothes to wear, even when I don't go anywhere all day - and dh loves it too! Though I would say that you look great in the photos I've seen - loved the hat in a previous pic!

Badness Jones said...

FRUMPY MUMMY? I'd give one of my toes to look as good as you! And to get as much accomplished, with little ones around so close in age. Go easy on yourself. I found it took about 3 years after the Princess was born for our love life to go back (nearly) to what it once was. And I fully expect it will take that long again after Bad. Life changes, relationships evolve, give it time. Big hugs!

nicole said...

hang in there!

herM said...

frumpy does NOT describe you! i so hear you, it does all seem to blow up at once. always. sorry this was your weekend :(. hugs to you. kids are SO hard on a relationship! part of the reason I started sanemoms ... trying to get at that stuff w.out being hard on yourself. you're an amazing mom and artist and wife. give yourself a break :) read somewhere today about scheduling time for spirituality and that pretty much applies to love life too these days, sad as that is. hope things look up soon.